Category Archives: Just a thought..

A lump of coal for this lass

In keeping with the festive season I have decorated my header with a little fella waiting beside the tree. It is the most decorating I have done so far.

I have always loved getting the house ready for Christmas. I look forward to it. We have a large box filled with ornaments and each one has a story behind it. My wee soldiers look forward to bringing out each one and hearing the tale that goes with it. There is a little chicken sitting on an egg with the caption ‘Mom -to-be’ on it dated 1992. This was the year I was pregnant with my Brown-eyed Boy. There is a cozy home dated 1995, marking our first home purchase. Each of the boys has a Baby’s 1st Christmas. There has to be at least 50 of these Hall*mark ornaments to hang on our tree and trimming our tree is a full weekend event.

This year I have not had any inkling to decorate the house. I’m not in the Christmas mood. Shopping seems like a huge chore. I never feel like going out to the shops, fighting with fellow shoppers for the perfect parking spot, the perfect gift etc.  Maybe it’s because I am too tired at the end of the day, maybe it’s because we have no snow. This year we won’t even be home for Christmas day, we’ll be a Sgt’s parents home. I am thinking about putting up our little 4ft tree and letting the boys decorate it with a few of their favorite ornaments.

Is it just me or is there anyone else out there feeling a little less Christmas Cheer this year?

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BarrenAlbion has set up a holiday card exchange for fellow IF bloggers. She’s an ambitious gal and must be full of the holiday spirit. Pop on over and sign up, I did. You’ll be able to send out some cards as well as get oodles of cards from around the globe.

Here a Google, there a Google, everywhere a Google Google

Sometimes I have to laugh at the phrases used in search engines that lead people to this site.

you belong in a zoo … you look like a monkey and you smell like one too.

still waiting for u … not sure who you are waiting for but I hope they show up soon.

donor sperm … Safe, effective sperm worldwide. Rigerous testing. Beautiful babies. As promised.

Customer Waiting … I hope you were not waiting very long.

october sucks … good to see that October not only sucked for me, it sucked for others too.

diui bfp … something I have had twice but sadly did not stick around.

and still waiting … I guess the person you are waiting for still has not shown up.

teenage attitude … great if you’re a teenager, not so great if you are the parent of a teenager.

why october sucks … I can’t speak for others, only myself. This site contains the opinion of a 36 year old woman with poor egg quality, lot’s of things suck. This is why it sucked for me. 

late payment  … something you will no doubt be calling me at work one day to have explained to you …

waiting on two pink lines … aren’t we all sweetheart, aren’t we all.

Dear Co-worker …

I have been happy to share some of my IF experiences with you over lunch occasionally. You know of our struggle … know that it will not happen for us without some type of medical intervention.

I thought the questions you have asked me were because you were genuinely concerned with how things were going for us. I was more than happy to share with you my knowledge of ovulation, OPK’s, HPT’s, meds, bloods and ultrasounds. I did not know that you were asking these questions just so you could make sure that you did not get pregnant. Charting your cycles so you would not conceive. 

However when you pulled me aside the other day to tell me that you saw “two pink lines” even though you had been using protection I was hurt, deeply hurt. To tell someone you know is having trouble conceiving and carrying to term ‘I have no idea how it could have happened.’ makes me want to scream rude words.

Instead I smile and ask how you feel about it only to hear that you have 9 months to ‘get use to the idea.’

Maybe it’s my fault for not saying what it was I really wanted to say but for now I will only say ‘Good morning.’ No more friendly chatter, avoid you at lunch and break and hope to God that watching you grow over the next 8 months or so does not make me want scream obscenities at you.

Sincerely,
The girl in the corner cubicle with the crap eggs who has to purchase sperm from a stranger in an attempt to impregnate herself.